Daily Archives: March 1, 2012

How To Be Loyal

Loyalty is a positive trait that is sometimes necessary for strengthening relationships amongst friends, family or coworkers. Some people may not be loyal to themselves, others or to anything for that matter. Lack of loyalty can allow people to mislabel you as selfish or someone who is completely unreliable. Others do have the qualities to be loyal but have made mistakes, which caused someone else to feel betrayed or disrespected.

Muir Beach

Many of us have experienced this to some degree. You may have hurt a friend by not being there for that friend when he or she really needed your support. You may have just cheated on your partner. Others may have been disloyal to the company they work for or an organization due to personal gain. Where ever you may be in terms of loyalty, there are steps you can take to help you remain loyal to others.

Define Loyalty. Many of us do not know what loyalty even means or have warped ideas of what loyalty is. This can stem from not really thinking about the subject or extend from the way others have shown loyalty to you. Understanding that loyalty means faithfulness to another, providing support to another, and keeping your commitments is the first step to developing loyalty.

Sacrifice. Loyalty requires making sacrifices for another. What’s important enough for you to be loyal for. Is it your country? Family? Your lover? Find out who or what you want to be loyal for and understand that that will require sacrifices on your end.

Understand their needs. It’s easy to make mistakes because you do not understand what the other person needs. For instance, a friend going through a difficult time may really need your support and advice while another may need you to stand up for him or her when being mistreated. You may be volunteering to help an organization and that organization may expect you to bring the supplied you promised and to be on time. Understand the needs of ones you choose to be loyal to so you can work on avoiding being disloyal.

Know Your Weaknesses. Everyone has weaknesses and that’s okay. To be loyal you need to understand what causes you to be disloyal. For instance, do you have a problem with cheating on significant others? Is it likely that that may be from flirting a bunch or from putting yourself in situations where you are alone with someone you are attracted to? Do you have a problem with breaking promises or not being supportive for a friend? Is that because you simply forget about the promises or are in a situation where you have a difficult time stopping what you are doing to go help your friend? Find out what your weaknesses are so you can be honest with yourself about that.

Can you be loyal? This can be tough to figure out, but after knowing what it takes to be loyal, you have to understand if you are able to be loyal. If committing to a cause requires lots of time from you, and you already have a packed schedule, then you may be unable to be loyal or be in situations where it will be very difficult to continue to be loyal. Alternatively, do you find yourself trying to be loyal but are around someone who is continually being unappreciative? It’s tough to be loyal when someone is taking advantage of that or is being completely unappreciative. It may not be worthwhile to be completely loyal to that friend if that loyalty is being disrespected.

Have A Support System. Loyalty, especially to significant others and friends can be difficult. Have someone you trust who you can talk to about this. If you have a problem cheating or being part of inappropriate activities that are hurting your relationships, then find friends who you can speak to about this problem. Be accountable to someone. Knowing that someone understands your weaknesses will help you in times where it’s tempting to be disloyal and when you make mistakes.

Avoid Traps. Avoid traps that cause disloyalty. If becoming drunk causes you to do things that disappoint your family, then avoid situations where you feel tempted to drink enough to get to that state. Avoid any type of inappropriate flirting if that makes cheating more likely. Avoid making too many commitments when you are aware that it’s likely you may forget or be unable to maintain so many commitments at once.

Strengthen your relationship. In other words, work on having a stronger relationship with the person or organization you are loyal to. If you have committed to a cause, then continue to be active to that cause. Lengthy periods of being inactive will make it much easier to be disloyal. If you are loyal to a close friend, then continue to work on having a stronger relationship with that friend. Stay in touch, spend some time together, and try to make some time for that person.

Remind yourself of the benefits of loyalty. Remember to spend some time appreciating the benefits of loyalty. Loyalty should be meaningful and rewarding so spend some time reminding yourself of the great things that have occurred due to your loyalty.